the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
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