Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
