TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Randomize
