this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
