I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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