that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize