i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Woke up this morning on my couch at 6am fully dressed including heels, holding half a corn dog. I called you last night when I was buying the corn dog from a street vendor, I think.
I am in love with you.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
