We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize