god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
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