Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize
