I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
