cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
