I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
