I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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