Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Randomize
