Can Purell be used as lube?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
