Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
