it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Randomize