Christians are straight up FREAKS
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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