Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
she peed on how many people?
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
Randomize
