PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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