Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is