you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize