did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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