I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
