Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
