Screwed.edu
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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