I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Randomize
