I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
