Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
