awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
