The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize