Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
