I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
