Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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