i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
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