Joe is yelling at the trees again.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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