i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
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