This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize