There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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