I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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