Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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