this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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