I just made out with a guy for $7.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Randomize
