I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize