Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass