When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
