She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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