Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time I think buying tan-thru bikinis is a good idea, remind me of that time I passed out in one and burned the epic shit out of my pussy.
When was that?
Yesterday. Bring aloe. For my pussy.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize