I just pynch a tree in the face
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I am never drinking with the goths again.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
Randomize
