she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
