ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Randomize