Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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